When Niro’s first son was born, he promised himself that he’d be the best father he possibly could be.
There was just one problem…
He didn’t know how to be a great father. There was no support or training he could find. It’s not as if there was any Fatherhood school he could attend.
So instead of just doing what others did, or letting his wife be the main parent, Niro decided to do something different.
He decided to run a series of experiments about how to be a good father and how to build a great relationship with his son. Of course, many of the experiments failed, resulting in tears and making Niro feel like a complete failure as a dad and a man.
However, over time, to his complete surprise, some of his experiments started to work. As he fine tuned these experiments, he found his relationship with his son only got better and he started enjoying fatherhood even more.
And then his second child was born!
Completely different in every way, Niro’s second child made him realize that there is no cookie cutter approach to raising kids! (Anyone who tells you that there is either plain naïve or trying to dad-shame you!)
However, what Niro found is that his fatherhood strategies worked just as well with his second kid, even though the personality was completely different to his first.
In fact, Niro’s close relationship with his children caught the attention of other dads, who started asking him what he was doing.
Niro started sharing his strategies with other dads – and to his complete surprise, he found they worked for them too, even though their kids were completely different to his.
And through his interactions with other dads, Niro realized that the biggest problems dads face today are
- Not feeling good enough as a man and a father.
After all, as men we’re expected to know all the answers, but what if we don’t? Unfortunately, too many of us are too afraid to ask for help as we believe we’ll be judged or thought of as weak. So we just lie to ourselves and everyone else, pretending that we know what we’re doing and that we all have it under control, when in reality we want to scream. We went up becoming a prisoner of our pretence!
- Shame at not knowing how to connect, communicate and influence their kids
Niro kept hearing things like, “I don’t get my kids. I used to be able to connect with them but then they grew up and became teenagers” or “I wish I could get my kids to do what I want them to without needing to yell or scream at them!” or “I am too impatient. I snap too easily and struggle to keep my frustration and anger from boiling over.”
- A deep sense of loneliness.
This was the biggest theme that kept coming up. Too many men felt like they had no where to turn to for help, guidance and support. If only there was a resource or community where Dads could feel supported without being judged, where they could share their inner fears and gain help from other men.
To help address these issues, Niro founded Family Focused Fathers with the aim of transforming fatherhood through the power of brotherhood. His mission was to provide a safe community where dads could air their concerns and get help from other men without being made to feel weak or inadequate as a man.
Initially, Family Focused Fathers started off as a simple Facebook community with 6 men, yet within a few months it had grown to a community of thousands of men from all over the globe, inspired by Niro’s daily messages of support and encouragement.
Now the author of “Dad, Don’t Quit On Us – How to Be The Father Your Kids Need You To Be While Still Being The Man You Want to Be”, Niro’s vision is to be able to create a community of dads helping dads and transform the conversation about fatherhood.
Ultimately, Niro wants men all around the globe to understand that being a father is not something you have to struggle with on your own. Rather, fatherhood is a skill you can get better at with the right training and support… AND an opportunity to heal your own emotional wounds.
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